Trams - a challenge for the skipper

This is a fiasco of the type
that give fiascos a bad name

Fantasy Bob is sorry to report that there is continuing controversy, not to say consternation, over the difficulties facing the skipper at Edinburgh City Council CC over the club's plans to lay a new wicket from the Airport to Leith. 

Despite over 500 million balls being bowled not a run has been scored.  Local batsmen, particularly those representing the ever emollient Taxi Drivers CC, are increasingly impatient. 

There is a fear that another 500 million balls will be necessary before the creases can be marked and play commence.  The skipper is uncertain whether his attack has sufficient bowling for this effort.  There is scepticism that the bowlers, who were originally recruited from the German league, may not have had sufficient Test experience to maintain control over line and length.

Suggestions are now being made from fielders on the boundary that the wicket should be terminated at Haymarket, which is considerably short of a length.  Some batsmen feel that a diet of bouncers on this restricted facility might be better than no bowling at all. Other batsmen are adamant that the playing surface has to be regulation length and full pitched bowling is essential. 

The skipper is therefore in a quandary and his position has been made more difficult by the fact that many of the senior players have discovered injuries which have led them to make themselves unavailable.  There appears to be little experience not only of managing a bowling attack but of completing the scorebook correctly.  A succession of disputes has been seen as the bowlers contend that the scorers have marked wides and no-balls against them incorrectly.

Fantasy Bob reported previously that an imaginative rescue plan which would have seen Carlton's doughty groundsman in charge of the completion of preparation of the playing surface was rejected - not least by the doughty groundsman himself.  The Council skipper is therefore in trouble and any suggestions from captains anywhere with relevant Test experience will be gratefully received.