Thursday 24 February 2011

Four Witterings for the Price of One

One of Fantasy Bob's 3 loyal readers has advised him of the extremely distressing situation he found himself recently.  Encountering a new computer, he attempted to find Fantasy Bob's writings by entering Witterings in the Google search engine.  Imagine his distress when he was lead not to these pages of customary nonsense, but instead to pages which offer the delights of East and West Wittering and.......er East and West Wittering.   For goodness sake, how many Witterings do you need? 

There appear to be 2 matching sets - one in Cambridgeshire and one in West Sussex.

Obviously the Sussex West Wittering is a cut above since they have a cricket club  which plays in Division 7 of the West Sussex Invitation League.  Excellent; the club also offers croquet and petanque.  West Wittering is also a surf centre.   As the Beach Boys could well have put it  'I wish they all could be West Wittering girls..............'

In FB's experience, cricket and surfing do not combine particularly well.  For one thing, stepping onto the back foot for a short pitched delivery tends to bring the front of the board up and dumps you in the briney.  Another issue FB has with surfing is that, in spite of the wholly wonderful efforts of the Beach Boys, it all seems a bit Australian.  Despite these limitations FB would not be surprised if a future Olympics boasted the introduction of synchronised-surf-cricket.  But the Olympics has nothing to do with sport of course.

Meanwhile, in another part of the galaxy, RAF Wittering is in Cambridgeshire and until last year proudly claimed to be the home of the Harrier jump jet.  FB imagines his 3 readers are just itching to go to view this airfield - they can safely do so if the follow the copious and precise directions in this wonderful website, Thunder and Lightnings, specially created for all you compulsive airfield viewers out there.  But be warned,  the website says
Rumour has it that another flying unit may move in at Wittering in the future, but Tutors are no replacement for Harriers! In the mean time the airfield remains open as a relief landing ground for other RAF stations but do not expect to see any regular activity - this guide therefore doesn't serve much of a purpose at the moment.
Oh well.  Maybe a trip to IKEA after all.

The Wittering Harriers having been taken out of service, have departed for storage at Cottesmore, which is in .....er West Sussex.  Is it all meant to connect?

Of the other Witterings there seems little to be said - or wittered - but FB is sure they are fine places all.

So unless you are interested in more on all this stuff, when you've lost Fantasy Bob's links, don't search for Witterings.  Search for Fantasy Bob and you'll strike gold. 

Also now on Twitter @realfantasybob.



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