Wednesday, 27 October 2010


It was 1980s stand up comedian Ben Elton who, in his motor mouth monologues, immortalised Thatch as the embodiment of all evil.  Thatch was of course then Prime Minister Mrs Margaret Thatcher.  Elton was a darling of the political left at that time - and he got well stuck into Thatch and her colleagues such as Normo Tebbs.  Elton is now reviled by those same fans as having sold his soul by scripting dire musicals based on the work of Queen.  Sic transit gloria. 

Fantasy Bob hears you saying 'Er.......and what exactly has this got to do with anything?' 

Well, Thatch came up again in a recent conversation FB was having with Carlton's doughty groundsman Magnus Moon.  MM is a true artist of the greensward, producing pitches of the highest quality at Grange Loan week in week out.  No praise is high enough for his work.  
  FB was asking Magnus about the secrets of his trade. 

Ben Elton

Our doughty groundsman

'Wage constant war on Thatch', said the great one, and it all came back to FB. 

The sparkly suit, the big red glasses, the motormouth.

If FB squinted his eyes just a little, it was not our doughty groundsman standing before him, but Ben Elton himself.  It was uncanny.

 'Thatch is the enemy.' 
FB didn't want to appear ignorant but he was unsure how pursuing a vendetta against a former prime minister could have any impact on the consistency of bounce at Grange Loan.  However he will seek enlightenment and report further.


  1. Magnus tells me that he is extremely flattered by Fantast Bob's comments on the quality of Grange Loan pitches and on Magnus's modest contribution (sadly these days often of a supervisory nature although he is hoping that an impending encounter with the sawbones will allow him to resume a more hands on role).

    Without, he hopes, giving too much away on Fantasy Bob's enlightenment and the reporting thereof, Magnus observes that taking the scarifier to Ben Elton's Thatch could have been an interesting, and, in some quarters at least, highly popular, experiment.

    In passing, Magnus noted FB's use of the word "enlightenment" and it caused him to wonder why, given the wide ranging nature of these witterings, FB has never commented on the Scottish Enlightenment.

    On a more carping note, he also notes that, not content with flogging the one gag to death during the season, FB has borrowed from Private Eye a gag that they have well and truly flogged to death over the past 40 years and more.

  2. Thankyou Iain, Fantasy Bob considers the fact that the joke has been repeated over at least 40 years proves its quality. Beethoven's symphonies are after all still being played many years after they first were heard. Of course many of FB's other jokes have an antiquity considerably greater. While FB does not generally do requests, he notes your search for enlightenment about er.......the enlightenment adn will give the subject appropriate consideration.