Friday, 12 November 2010


Fantasy Bob thinks it is time to raise with his readers, all 3 of them, one of the great unanswered questions in contemporary science. Greater minds than FB's have stumbled when faced with this crucial question - can Daleks play cricket?

FB accepts that the context of this vital debate has moved on - at one time discussion was generally confined to the issue of whether Daleks could climb staircases.  While the majority view was that they couldn't, and therefore that retreat to the upper level of a building was a sure escape when being chased by a Dalek, this was proved to be a belief as sound as that the pre Copernican assertion that the earth is flat.  In 2005 Daleks were shown ascending staircases.  Now, they may have made a bit of a mess of the stair carpet with all their rockets and smoke and stuff, but they successfully made progress in the general direction of up. FB cannot recall seeing them descending a staircase, but imagines the same technique could be used, so the basement isn't the place to hide either.

But to return to the question of cricket, and whether Daleks can play it.  At first sight it seems unlikely. For one thing how would they strap on pads and where would they wear a box.  But given their generally metally composition these protections are perhaps not necessary.  There would seem to be no danger of being no-balled for chucking since Dalek arms are always straight.  FB suspects their capability at spin bowling might be limited and they might have to be reminded not to roll along the wicket when taking a run.  Appeals would be tiresome confined to a collective (and probably repeated) shout of 'Exterminate'.  None of this is conclusive and we must retain an open mind.  However FB has extensively researched the images returned from the Hubble space telescope and has come across this faint image, which must be seen as conclusive evidence.

Bring on the Poms

Close observers will note that this Dalek batter has donned the baggy green cap and is obviously pressing his case for selection in the coming Ashes matches.

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