For this relief much thanks

Cricketers have been shocked by the news that players of the Carlton All Stars 4th XI had resisted the temptation to relieve themselves on the Grange Loan square during the twilight celebrations of their triumphant capturing of the prestigious 5th place in ESCA Division 8.

Observers say they distinctly saw the players standing around doing nothing.  Some of them even seemed to be going home.

A source close to the go ahead Edinburgh club said, 'What kind of behaviour is that?  If our youngsters aspire to be English Test players, they need a different approach to bladder control.'

There were suggestions that the shameful behaviour witnessed at the weekend is the result of a serious failure of leadership of the side. Fantasy Bob, the so called skipper of this triumphant team was not to be seen during these disgraceful events.  Rumours are that he was to went to the toilet at the Festival Theatre during the interval of yet another Festival event he was attending.

Fantasy Bob was unavailable for comment - even from behind the locked lavatory door.

England's Test team setting an example