Wise caddy - modest and unassuming |
For Fantasy Bob has never quite understood why golfers are allowed to take a personal servant onto the course with them. This personal servant carries the golfer's equipment, tells him (or her) exactly where the hole is and wipes his balls, or her balls as it were. These are all aspects of the game of golf that FB has mastered, so he is unsure why top level payers are so hopeless that they require someone else to perform them. Would they drop the bag - leaving behind them a trail of clubs, balls, tees and half eaten sandwiches? Would they get confused in which general direction the hole lay, even though, in FB's experience, a flag in the middle distance was a pretty good cue?
No other sport allows personal assistants of this sort. Cricket would be a different game if a batsman could deem his bat too heavy to carry between shots and choose from a selection prior to his shot. Or if the bowler considered that a servant should carry the ball to the crease and pass it to him before he bowled - having first advised him that it is 22 yards to the other end of the wicket with a slight crosswind left to right. A different game - and a poorer game - fans would start utterring you're the man and such drivel. FB has never been convinced that golf is any better a game because of the caddy and what the harm would be if the players had to carry their own equipment. It would add a minimal athleticism to the game.
Stupid caddy - everything but |
But Williams is a man without a sense of proportion and forgets that he earned vast amounts of moolah when he worked for Woods. He cannot resist publicly badmothing him. He may feel rough about being sacked, but he has another post and his new master is not unsuccessful. So, he would be well advised to shut up and stick to wiping balls, not uttering them.
Meanwhile, tea anyone?
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