Jenners

Financial analysts are still working to determine the extent to which the imminent closure of Jenners, aka Edinburgh's flagship department store, can be attributable to its failure over the years to stock an acceptable range of cricket kit.  Or, indeed, any cricket kit at all.  

FB has a distant memory of there once being a small sports department in the basement of the prestigious building.  He is not sure that this is an accurate memory - nor is he confident that he has not made up the recollection that when he asked if they had any thigh pads, he was directed to ladies lingerie.  A pleasant enough experience, but ultimately unfruitful.  He explained to the assistant he needed protection against uneven bounce.  A request which was radically misunderstood. 

The failure to carry cricket kit seems to be a common feature of retail failure.  It is remarkable how many of the so called household names now in difficulty have simply ignored cricketers' needs. News is also current that Debenhams' Edinburgh store will also close.  FB is not surprised.  It was an insult to cricketers.  Once upon a time FB was hard pressed for time before the meet for an important away game.  He could not find his box anywhere.  He had no choice but to seek a replacement in Debenham's Princes Street store.   He searched the store high and low.  The only thing he could find that vaguely resembled the required item was an egg coddler.   His performance as the crease that day was even less memorable than usual.  But - silver linings - his poached eggs for breakfast next day were perfect.  

FB understands that Debenhams has been bought out by BooHoo - which does not seem to FB  a proper name for a shop.  He understands it not to be a noted cricket retailer.

The news about Jenners may not be as fatal as first suggested.  Subsequent reports say that the landlord, a Danish billionaire by name of Anders Povlsen is committed to maintaining it as a retail space.  So the opportunity for that up to the minute boutique Gray Nicholls franchise may not be lost.  That could be the master stroke which would restore the place to its previous glory.

But FB is not holding his breath. Mr Povlsen may not be a friend to cricketers. Apparently he is the second largest landowner in Scotland (first is the Duke of Buccleuch since you ask) with holdings of 890 square kilometres.  Shamefully, there is not one cricket pitch in that vast area.  The chance of the Gray Nicholls franchise may therefore be illusory.  Maybe BooHoo is the correct response after all.