Tuesday 14 April 2020

A Conspiracy

There appears to be a conspiracy against conspiracy theories.  A broadcaster with the unlikely name of Sherlock Holmes, and of whose existence Fantasy Bob has previously been oblivious, has been getting it in the neck for appearing to suggest that the theory about the coronavirus and 5G technology might be worthy of discussion.

If FB understands this theory, it has it that the present pandemic is not attributable to new deadly virus but is the product of the 5G telecoms network. It is a high level (as all conspiracies are) conspiracy against Western economies by the Chinese facilitated by a conspiracy of silence against this self-evident fact.  Adherents of the theory are engaged in burning down the transmission masts to stop the spread of the disease.

They are also warning against the use of Bank of England £20 notes, since they bear 5G symbolism and are therefore of obvious danger.  The Bof E, and by implication the Government of the UK, are therefore part of the conspiracy.

Of course, the fact that reputable scientists are denying these claims as hokum (to use the scientific term) only entrenches the views of adherents.  On the whole FB is on the side of reputable scientists on this issue - as on most issues. The claims of the conspiracists seem unlikely.

Or so he thought until he chanced upon a tweet by one Tiffani Cyr.  Ms Cyr appears to be a God fearing resident of Florida and an admirer of the present incumbent of the Oval Office.  Let that not count against her, for she also appears to be an accomplished historian and her tweet (which she may or may not have originated) brings a proper historical perspective to this issue.

She notes how technological development in radio frequencies has invariably been followed by the outbreak of disease - starting from the 1916 development of radio waves followed by the Spanish flu pandemic.



This got FB thinking. He drew up his own chart on Ms Cyr's design.  It revealed some startling facts.

1916 emergence of Radio Waves
1918 - FB unable to play leg spin bowling
2003 - 3G introduced to the world
2003 - FB unable to play leg spin bowling
2009 - 4G introduced to the world
2009 - FB unable to play leg spin bowling
2019/20 - 5G introduced to the world
2019/20 - FB unable to play leg spin bowling

Need FB say more.  It is a conspiracy.

6 comments:

  1. David Icke has a lot to answer for. I suspect that FB's inability to play leg spin may not be statistically significant, in more than one way

    ReplyDelete
  2. Miss Firecracker15 April 2020 at 10:57

    Revelation! Now I know why I never win any races

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. FB is pleased to educate and inform since he rarely amuses.

      Delete